Why is it that we can never truly help another person?

Preacher Questions and AnswersCategory: QuestionsWhy is it that we can never truly help another person?
Avatar of Meenakshi GuptaMeenakshi Gupta asked 7 years ago

I remember hearing this addressed in a speech, but I need to be reminded again. So many times I get proud about helping others, even though I know I shouldn’t be.

1 Answers
Avatar of Pooja AnandPooja Anand Staff answered 7 years ago

Out of goodness, we desire to see another person make good choices and do things that lead to their happiness. However, no matter how clear it is to us when they are harming themselves through destructive thinking patterns, or by missing spiritual opportunities by disregarding the need for God in their life, we cannot change another person’s mind. We can advise, educate, and motivate, but no matter how much we want to, we can’t change another person’s mind. They have to do that themselves.
 
When it comes to physically helping someone, we should remember that we are actually helping ourselves. By doing something good, we find peace of mind, and develop the sattvic quality of our personality. As for the person, they will only get what’s coming to them. In other words, if it was in their destiny to receive help, they would have received it from someone else if not from you. So you are merely an instrument of their destiny (according to their own past lives’ karm). In that way, you can remain humble by knowing that they were not dependent on you, and they would have gotten the help from somewhere else anyway. Which is not to say that you shouldn’t have helped them – you should, because it is the right thing to do – but also keep in mind that you are not in any way “saving” them.