Any kind of action is not possible without a reason. If we can always preserve this understanding in our consciousness then we can never become attached to anything. Nobody is anyone’s well-wisher. Everyone is a well-wisher of their own self only. But, it is seen that people are well-wishers of one another.
For example, a wife stays up all night to take care of her sick husband. A mother stays up all night to take care of her ill son. Self-interest is hidden behind such seemingly unconditional actions of people. The wife thinks, “If my husband dies, then my life will become a mess, so I must stay up at night to save his life. He shouldn’t die. I must call a doctor.” The husband on the contrary thinks, “It appears as though she is doing me a great favor. She loves me very dearly.” But, everyone loves their own self only, not anyone else.
If that is the case then one may ask, when a child is born, a mother does everything for the child. What does the child do for the mother? Isn’t this an example of unconditional love? O No! self-interest is hidden there also. The mother dreams, “My child will grow up and become a collector, a commissioner, earn lots of money, take care of me.” Self-interest is hiding everywhere.
If by chance the same child dies, the same son dies, the same husband dies, then all the hopes die. The same person says, “Take him out. Take him out of the house right now. Make arrangements to cremate him, else his body will rot and it will smell bad. He might become a ghost in the house and trouble me. Cremate him.” What happened to that love? He is still laying there.
Thus, everyone is a well-wisher of their own self only. Attachment develops due to a false impression that another person is doing us a favor, that someone is our well-wisher.